The Crossing's Closing - Repercussions
As the dust settles after the emotionally tumultous three week build-up to the CLOSE of THE CROSSING, I find myself somewhat deflated and yet at peace - or maybe that's just pure exhaustion, it's truly been an emotional rollercoaster.
I find such great comfort however in knowing that God is taking care of all of us. Watching the KOMO 4 news spot on the Crossing's final hours was a such a blessing - demonstrating how God really is caring for us. Standing with my brothers and sisters - the Crossing family - as we eagerly await God's revealed will.
He has placed a PASTOR over this Crossing Ministry that demonstrates a Christ-like humility and transparency just not demonstrated from many (hardly any) pulpits. A shepherd who truly CARES about his sheep - who sacrifices and suffers much to grow and protect them. Dennis Stewart has been a wonderful inspiration and a true hero of the faith - even members of the secular news media recognize this truth as Dennis gives all the glory to God - noting He is our hope and confidence.
It is in times of adversity and trial that the true nature of our character is revealed and Dennis, while no more perfect than anyone else - has proved to be a man after God's own heart, quick to repent, forgive and seek God's strength and guidance through it all while those who should be pastoring and caring for him have shown little honor and only token respect for him. As we know light came into the world and the world despised it cause it exposed the darkness for what it was and they liked the darkness just fine - they didn't want enlightment. Likewise Dennis' humility and true faith reveal the lack of it in those who surround him - I know I have been convicted (and repentant). Dennis' authentic compassion and self-less concern for others expose that void in others.
That's been one of the most disheartening aspects of this whole affair - being subjected to church leaders and elders who say one thing and then consistently act in manor completely contradictory - not only to what they have expressed as being their heart, but contradictory to the heart of God as explicably expressed in HIs WORD. I have seen this gracious man treated in a way that is abominable to those he has treated with nothing but honor. Even so, he continues to hit his knees in prayer, rising to walk in a manner that honors God - quick to forgive and bless, only to be met by what I perceived to be self-serving hard-heartedness.
Why bring this up?
Because the last week of Demember God had me in the Book of Revelations as I worked to complete a paper for school. The Spirit profoundly impressed upon my heart, the timeliness and current implications of Jesus' letters to the churches.
When I heard that our sponsoring church had to close our doors (which no one begrudges them, if there is no money - there is no money), I thought of all those I have heard or read expressing longing for the NEW TESTAMENT - or the ACTS 6 church, as we began to process this loss - sharing our testimonies and memories, mourning the loss of this place where most of us have experienced acceptance, genuine love and family for the first if not only time - I could hear the Spririt saying, "THIS IS IT!"
We cannot design it - or define it. Only God who crafted it can orchestrate it. Like a masterful conductor bringing all the instruments into alignment - inspiring them to play as He created them to play, at their increasingly optimum level - creating the most beautiful, enriching music.
I recall this experiment I saw on a tv news magazine where they had a renowned violinist who was scheduled to play a sold-out concert, dress ordinarily and play in the subway. Most folks just hurried by, not pausing to appreciate or recognize his musical mastery for which others where willing to pay top dollar.
They were oblivious to the jewel in their midst - LIKE THE CROSSING, cars just whizz by on Pacific Highway, unbeknownst to them that healing, deliverance and mighty works of the most HIGH, Creator GOD of the Universe are unfolding in this indescript little building. Unfortunately equally oblivious to those who sponsored this outreach. Some of whom were content to drop in over the holidays to do their good works - serve the poor, comfortably separated by the food tables - eager to finish the task and hurry on to what they truly value. They missed out.
They hurried right on by that which God declares He values - the broken hearted, the rejected and neglected, the mentally challenged, the unloved... They are as equal and as important members of the Body of Christ and should be treated and included as SUCH.
The time for Christ's return is nearer today - than it was yesterday, that much is certain. I believe that God is drafting a LETTER to the CHURCHES and He is using the Crossing to do it.
Again - why bring this up?
Frankly it pains me to do so but I find solace in believing that probably no one will read this emboldening me to walk in obedience as God reminds me - He did not bring me to this place to "wink at sin" using as an excuse for silence the need to honor leaders - when in fact dishonesty is dishonor.
And I must honor what God has taught me through my work at the Crossing, that it is imperative to challenge those I encounter there who are stuck in the rut of some sin; challenging those I love to step up their game (the way that God challenges me daily in my personal walk) - we exhort and edify because we love and are loved and frankly the time is short - growing shorter.
We as the Body of Christ need to be firing on all cylinders - performing at our spiritual optimum - not complacent in our comfort zones - while our brothers and sisters teeter on the edge of eternal damnation.
Those who sponsored this minstry would often talk about the "sense of entitlement" expressed by most (by their perception) of those we serve, and while I concur that that element is certainly present, over the past three weeks it has become apparent that it comes nowhere close to rivaling their own.
The manner in which actions are justified - and this has nothing to do with the decision to close the Crossing, but the manner in which it was implemented, with no consideration of or for those who have served here faithfully over the last year or more. The prevalent attitude being - It's their building, their stuff and they can and will do what they want to make the money they need to sustain what they value. Their building/property - Really? Their words may convey shrewd stewardship but do their actions convey the heart of God, not to mention trust in God - a God who doesn't exert HIS RIGHTs but instead emptied himself of all His entitlements as creator of the universe and came as a humble man to wash the feet of others - He came to serve, not be served...
Again as trials reveal the contents of our hearts - I have found myself challenged and convicted on many levels - and somewhat chastised by the Lord for among other things - entitlement. I am grateful for this season of greater purification as I come to realize how inadequate I am apart from my Lord, how shallow and selfish I can be left to my own devices, thankful that He saved me from such shortsighted self-indulgence. Surely I may go there - but thankfully I can't stay there - because I am committed to pursue MY FIRST and ONLY TRUE LOVE and I can't do both - serve my self and serve my Lord, I must choose.
In the final weeks of last year - Dennis declared 2011 to be the year of decision and I believe it. I can see see Elijah crying out to the Israelites on Mt Carmel - who you gonna serve Jehovah or Baal? I see many today and sometimes myself tempted to try to do just that.
This is a season for surrender, release - transparency and truthfulness - and as always HUMILITY. I walk away from this experience with forgiveness in my heart, healing the hurts and a great sense of gratitude for the sponsorship and the wonderful support and encouragement that was received. Mistakes and errors occur but they cannot erase the gracious heartfelt support and love experienced over the past year anymore than forgiveness can negate the offenses incurred. But that's for God to sort out and I know all things work together for good for those who love God and are called according to His purpose.
But Jesus is coming - and His warnings are dire - in Revelations He makes it clear that He is in the midst of His churches and very much aware of what is going on - so for those who read this and want to label me critical or judgmental - agreed it is not mine to judge but I cannot ignore what I do discern and to remain silent before those who think they are secure even though their lampstand may be in jeopardy would be akin to remaining silent while someone stands on the railroad tracks as the train bears down - the person who's standing on the tracks may choose to ignore the shouts of warning - but it isn't only for their benefit that the alarm sounds - others may hear and heed the warning and stand clear and be spared, so I will be obedient.
As for us - the Crossing crowd, easily set aside, many of us rejected by families and churches alike - LORD, even as those feelings of neglect and rejection seek to reemerge as the enemy whispers his lies, let us remember that we are not the paupers the world and many in the church envision us to be - they may rush on by - but Jesus sees and stops and stays with us and as He said to His church in Smyrna (Rev. 2:9-10): "I know your afflictions and your poverty—yet you are rich! I know about the slander of those who say they are Jews and are not, but are a synagogue of Satan. Do not be afraid of what you are about to suffer."
I find such great comfort however in knowing that God is taking care of all of us. Watching the KOMO 4 news spot on the Crossing's final hours was a such a blessing - demonstrating how God really is caring for us. Standing with my brothers and sisters - the Crossing family - as we eagerly await God's revealed will.
He has placed a PASTOR over this Crossing Ministry that demonstrates a Christ-like humility and transparency just not demonstrated from many (hardly any) pulpits. A shepherd who truly CARES about his sheep - who sacrifices and suffers much to grow and protect them. Dennis Stewart has been a wonderful inspiration and a true hero of the faith - even members of the secular news media recognize this truth as Dennis gives all the glory to God - noting He is our hope and confidence.
It is in times of adversity and trial that the true nature of our character is revealed and Dennis, while no more perfect than anyone else - has proved to be a man after God's own heart, quick to repent, forgive and seek God's strength and guidance through it all while those who should be pastoring and caring for him have shown little honor and only token respect for him. As we know light came into the world and the world despised it cause it exposed the darkness for what it was and they liked the darkness just fine - they didn't want enlightment. Likewise Dennis' humility and true faith reveal the lack of it in those who surround him - I know I have been convicted (and repentant). Dennis' authentic compassion and self-less concern for others expose that void in others.
That's been one of the most disheartening aspects of this whole affair - being subjected to church leaders and elders who say one thing and then consistently act in manor completely contradictory - not only to what they have expressed as being their heart, but contradictory to the heart of God as explicably expressed in HIs WORD. I have seen this gracious man treated in a way that is abominable to those he has treated with nothing but honor. Even so, he continues to hit his knees in prayer, rising to walk in a manner that honors God - quick to forgive and bless, only to be met by what I perceived to be self-serving hard-heartedness.
Why bring this up?
Because the last week of Demember God had me in the Book of Revelations as I worked to complete a paper for school. The Spirit profoundly impressed upon my heart, the timeliness and current implications of Jesus' letters to the churches.
When I heard that our sponsoring church had to close our doors (which no one begrudges them, if there is no money - there is no money), I thought of all those I have heard or read expressing longing for the NEW TESTAMENT - or the ACTS 6 church, as we began to process this loss - sharing our testimonies and memories, mourning the loss of this place where most of us have experienced acceptance, genuine love and family for the first if not only time - I could hear the Spririt saying, "THIS IS IT!"
We cannot design it - or define it. Only God who crafted it can orchestrate it. Like a masterful conductor bringing all the instruments into alignment - inspiring them to play as He created them to play, at their increasingly optimum level - creating the most beautiful, enriching music.
I recall this experiment I saw on a tv news magazine where they had a renowned violinist who was scheduled to play a sold-out concert, dress ordinarily and play in the subway. Most folks just hurried by, not pausing to appreciate or recognize his musical mastery for which others where willing to pay top dollar.
They were oblivious to the jewel in their midst - LIKE THE CROSSING, cars just whizz by on Pacific Highway, unbeknownst to them that healing, deliverance and mighty works of the most HIGH, Creator GOD of the Universe are unfolding in this indescript little building. Unfortunately equally oblivious to those who sponsored this outreach. Some of whom were content to drop in over the holidays to do their good works - serve the poor, comfortably separated by the food tables - eager to finish the task and hurry on to what they truly value. They missed out.
They hurried right on by that which God declares He values - the broken hearted, the rejected and neglected, the mentally challenged, the unloved... They are as equal and as important members of the Body of Christ and should be treated and included as SUCH.
The time for Christ's return is nearer today - than it was yesterday, that much is certain. I believe that God is drafting a LETTER to the CHURCHES and He is using the Crossing to do it.
Again - why bring this up?
Frankly it pains me to do so but I find solace in believing that probably no one will read this emboldening me to walk in obedience as God reminds me - He did not bring me to this place to "wink at sin" using as an excuse for silence the need to honor leaders - when in fact dishonesty is dishonor.
And I must honor what God has taught me through my work at the Crossing, that it is imperative to challenge those I encounter there who are stuck in the rut of some sin; challenging those I love to step up their game (the way that God challenges me daily in my personal walk) - we exhort and edify because we love and are loved and frankly the time is short - growing shorter.
We as the Body of Christ need to be firing on all cylinders - performing at our spiritual optimum - not complacent in our comfort zones - while our brothers and sisters teeter on the edge of eternal damnation.
Those who sponsored this minstry would often talk about the "sense of entitlement" expressed by most (by their perception) of those we serve, and while I concur that that element is certainly present, over the past three weeks it has become apparent that it comes nowhere close to rivaling their own.
The manner in which actions are justified - and this has nothing to do with the decision to close the Crossing, but the manner in which it was implemented, with no consideration of or for those who have served here faithfully over the last year or more. The prevalent attitude being - It's their building, their stuff and they can and will do what they want to make the money they need to sustain what they value. Their building/property - Really? Their words may convey shrewd stewardship but do their actions convey the heart of God, not to mention trust in God - a God who doesn't exert HIS RIGHTs but instead emptied himself of all His entitlements as creator of the universe and came as a humble man to wash the feet of others - He came to serve, not be served...
Again as trials reveal the contents of our hearts - I have found myself challenged and convicted on many levels - and somewhat chastised by the Lord for among other things - entitlement. I am grateful for this season of greater purification as I come to realize how inadequate I am apart from my Lord, how shallow and selfish I can be left to my own devices, thankful that He saved me from such shortsighted self-indulgence. Surely I may go there - but thankfully I can't stay there - because I am committed to pursue MY FIRST and ONLY TRUE LOVE and I can't do both - serve my self and serve my Lord, I must choose.
In the final weeks of last year - Dennis declared 2011 to be the year of decision and I believe it. I can see see Elijah crying out to the Israelites on Mt Carmel - who you gonna serve Jehovah or Baal? I see many today and sometimes myself tempted to try to do just that.
This is a season for surrender, release - transparency and truthfulness - and as always HUMILITY. I walk away from this experience with forgiveness in my heart, healing the hurts and a great sense of gratitude for the sponsorship and the wonderful support and encouragement that was received. Mistakes and errors occur but they cannot erase the gracious heartfelt support and love experienced over the past year anymore than forgiveness can negate the offenses incurred. But that's for God to sort out and I know all things work together for good for those who love God and are called according to His purpose.
But Jesus is coming - and His warnings are dire - in Revelations He makes it clear that He is in the midst of His churches and very much aware of what is going on - so for those who read this and want to label me critical or judgmental - agreed it is not mine to judge but I cannot ignore what I do discern and to remain silent before those who think they are secure even though their lampstand may be in jeopardy would be akin to remaining silent while someone stands on the railroad tracks as the train bears down - the person who's standing on the tracks may choose to ignore the shouts of warning - but it isn't only for their benefit that the alarm sounds - others may hear and heed the warning and stand clear and be spared, so I will be obedient.
As for us - the Crossing crowd, easily set aside, many of us rejected by families and churches alike - LORD, even as those feelings of neglect and rejection seek to reemerge as the enemy whispers his lies, let us remember that we are not the paupers the world and many in the church envision us to be - they may rush on by - but Jesus sees and stops and stays with us and as He said to His church in Smyrna (Rev. 2:9-10): "I know your afflictions and your poverty—yet you are rich! I know about the slander of those who say they are Jews and are not, but are a synagogue of Satan. Do not be afraid of what you are about to suffer."
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